I am terribly sorry, but I'm going to have to be brief. I'm running short on time, just like you. But I wanted to write to you today anyway, because what I have to say is important. Although, it isn't exactly what I have to say, but what Reggie Dabbs had to say this morning. Reggie Dabbs is a motivational speaker and soprano saxophone player. He does a lot of work at schools and with football and other sports teams, and I have no doubt that he has saved lives. He came from a troubled childhood; he was given away by his mother because she slept with a man for twenty dollars to feed her other two children, and he was the result. Needless to say, he has overcome.
He talked to my school this morning about bullying. I was horrified at what he had to say, but also motivated - I suppose I should have been, seeing as he was a motivational speaker. He told the story of three girls who had decided that they would bully whoever got out of the next car until he or she left school. The victim left a voice message on her mom's phone later that day crying, saying "Mom, they won't stop, they won't stop. I love you, Mom, I love you."
After she hung up, she gave up the gift of life.
One of the girls felt horrible about everything that had happened, and she got a year in juvy. The other two challenged the law, saying the law had no hold on them.
They are serving twenty years in prison.
Reggie told us that if words can inspire and help and lift, words can kill.
He told us how he was bullied in his younger years, and how he stopped an act of bullying. He told us the heartbreaking story of three second graders; two boys who told a girl that she was the ugliest girl they had ever seen. They told her to please get off the bus and walk in front of a car to end their misery.
She did.
There are so many lessons I took from that assembly. I left the auditorium with new eyes, eyes that saw that there are things that I cannot see that are happening every day, every moment, terrible things that no one should ever have to go through. Reggie told us about football teams he had talked to who weren't succeeding on the field because they were constantly up against each other, tearing each other down. There are enough hard things that people have to go through without their peers making it harder. We already have to deal with the tackles and fumbles and missed touchdowns; we shouldn't have to endure jibes and jeers from our own team.
Reggie told us that we should love people just because they are breathing, just because they are human. I believe that to my very core. Everyone is worth being loved, and everyone has gone through so much more than we can ever imagine. Reggie asked if we are part of the problem or the solution. Throughout my life, through literature or media or the voices of those around me, I have been told that there are two types of people, the wolves and the sheep. Or whichever analogy you want to use. I disagree with the wolf and sheep philosophy. I like how Scout from To Kill a Mockingbird put it: "I think there's just one kind of folks. Folks." But I do think that there are people in different types of situations. There are people who are in a situation in which they can help others, and in which they do help others. There are people who are in a situation in which they can hurt, and where they do hurt. These two types of situations, or lifestyles, more like, are active. You must decide one way or the other, and that's all that matters. Your choice, just like Reggie said, whether you will be the problem or the solution. I'll tell you a secret: We can all be whichever one we like. Whether it's by simply smiling, being a role model, and responding with kindness, or by saying a cruel word, being a negative influence, or doing nothing when the storm hits, and you can stop it. These tiny decisions we make throughout our daily lives determine things that are so much larger; the difference between life and death, the strength of a character, the potential of an individual. It is like turning a plane too far to the left by a single degree, and ending up in the wrong place by thousands of miles.
There is a third situation, I think. There is a situation where people need help and are being harmed. This is a passive situation; it is not your fault if you are a victim. At one point, everyone is in this situation, and the way we react can determine which of the above to situations we end up in once we surface. But through this low, you have to remember that there is hope, and you will overcome. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel, always a calm after a storm. And most of all, look for the people who are helping, because they are the hope. Did you hear that, helpers? You are the hope! And hope is one of the most powerful things in the world, one of the few things that are stronger than fear. Hope, and faith, and love.
So I think I could revise the wolf and sheep philosophy to add a shepherd. There are sheep, there are wolves, and there are shepherds. It's inevitable that we will all, at one point or other, be a sheep, whether we are victim to the wolves or just the rocky terrain. And remember, too, that not only you, but everyone else, has once been a sheep; even the wolves. In fact, some of them are still only sheep in wolves' clothing. But once we recover, we decide whether we will be a shepherd or a wolf. I, for one, will be a shepherd.
Keep on keeping on,
Mikela
P. S. So much for brief :)
